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Started by spiritandtruth at 04-18-2007 5:20 PM. Topic has 7 replies.

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   04-18-2007, 5:20 PM
spiritandtruth is not online. Last active: 5/31/2007 3:02:45 AM spiritandtruth

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Need some answers
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I have recently been introduced to some muslims. They are not at all what I have believed them to be. They are kind and happy and loving people. Everyone I mention this to gets freaked out saying that they are terrorists and that they abuse their women. I have read the articles here about women and also some others on different sites. My confusion comes from not knowing how to decipher who is lying and who is telling the truth? I don't know wat the Quran says and so when verses are quoted, I have no idea if they are accurate. I have noticed that there are Muslims and non-muslims on this board and so I thought it might be a good place to start asking questions. Maybe I will be able to weed through the responses and come to the right conclusion! Thanks in advance

spiritandtruth
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   04-19-2007, 7:39 AM
Guide To Salvation is not online. Last active: 1/19/2008 7:03:46 PM Guide To Salvation

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Re: Need some answers
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The following come for the collections of the sayings of the Prophet, known as the Sunnah or Hadith to Muslims. This is Islams second holiest source after the Qur'an.

Women are the twin halves of men.

The world and all things in it are valuable; but the most valuable thing in the world is a virtuous woman.

The best women are the virtuous; they are the most affectionate to infants, and the most careful of their husband's property.

When a woman performs the five times of prayer, and fasts the month of Ramadan, and is chaste, and is not disobedient to her husband, then tell her to enter Paradise by whichever door she likes.

Asma, daughter of Yazid, said, "Victuals were brought to Muhammad, and he put them before some of us women who were present, and said, 'Eat ye.' But notwithstanding we were hungry we said, 'We have no inclination.' Muhammad said, 'O woman! Do not mix hunger with lies.'"

Whoever doeth good to girls, it will be a curtain to him from hell-fire.

Whoever befriends two girls till they come of age, will be in the next world along with me, like my two fingers joining each other.

Whoever befriends three daughters, or three sisters, and teaches them manners, and is affectionate to them, till they come of age, may God apportion Paradise for him.

Whoever hath a daughter, and doth not bury her alive or scold her, or prefer his male children to her, may God bring him into Paradise.

Shall I not point out to you the best of virtues? It is your doing good to your daughter when she is returned to you having been divorced by her husband.

God enjoins you to treat women well, for they are your mothers, daughters, aunts.

The rights of women are sacred. See that women are maintained in the rights assigned to them.

Do not prevent your women from coming to the mosque.


These are verses in the Qur'an that pertain to women:


Qur'an 33:35 "For men and women who are devoted to God -- believing men and women, obedient men and women, truthful men and women, steadfast men and women, humble men and women, charitable men and women, fasting men and women, chaste men and women, men and women who remember God often -- God has prepared forgiveness and a rich reward."

Qur'an 16:97 "To whoever, male or female, does good deeds and has faith, we shall give a good life and reward them according to the best of their actions."

Qur'an 4:19 "You who believe, it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will, nor should you treat your wives harshly, hoping to take back some of the bride-gift you gave them, unless they are guilty of something clearly outrageous. Live with them in accordance with what is fair and kind: if you dislike them, it may well be that you dislike something in which God has put much good. If you wish to replace one wife with another, do not take any of her bride-gift back, even if you have given her a great amount of gold. How could you take it when this is unjust and a blatant sin? How could you take it when you have lain with each other and they have taken a solemn pledge from you?"

Qur'an 2:187 "You [believers] are permitted to lie with your wives during the night of the fast: they are [close] as garments to you, as you are to them."

Qur'an 30:21 "Another of his signs is that he created spouses from among yourselves for you to live with in tranquility: He ordained love and kindness between you. There truly are signs in this for those who reflect.

Hope it helps.


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   04-19-2007, 10:36 AM
spiritandtruth is not online. Last active: 5/31/2007 3:02:45 AM spiritandtruth

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Re: Need some answers
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ok ... so am I to understand that when other sites quote verses from the Quran talking about beating your wife, they are making it up?
What about talk of a husband basically having the right to 'have' his wife whenever he wants but also to withold the same right from his wife?
Why do women have to cover themselves from head to toe while men can walk around freely in whatever they want?
The qoutations you provided are very beautiful in speaking of women, but if this is the case, what accounts for the confusion?
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   04-23-2007, 9:04 AM
Guide To Salvation is not online. Last active: 1/19/2008 7:03:46 PM Guide To Salvation

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Re: Need some answers
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Missionaries make it seem like Muslims have the right to abuse their wives and beat them. I assure you this is not the case. This video gives an explanation about the verse

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZOShXyq1cw&mode=related&search=

As for the covering, this isn't new to Islam, Do you think Hijab was just in fashion in the days of the virgin Mary? Just because Muslim women don't run around in short shorts and tight low cut shirts, it doesn't meen they don't have rights, it means they're modest and live in accordance to Gods morals. Muslims view hijab as a benefit. Consider this story:

http://www.guidetosalvation.com/Website/US%20latinas.htm


You can find many more examples and videos in my site.

Hope this helps.
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   04-30-2007, 6:48 PM
mslmgrl is not online. Last active: 5/3/2007 8:12:47 AM mslmgrl

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Smile [:)] Re: Need some answers
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hello spiritandtruth!

I just wanted to give a response to your question from the perspective of a muslim woman.

The verse in question is found in sura 4 verse 34. It is one that is quite complex but often, sadly, only a small portion is used to show that a muslim husband can beat his wife or that he can deny her the marriage due.

To begin with, the verse opens by stating that men are the protectors and maintainers of women. A husband could certainly not be the protector of his wife if he were to beat her, could he? Of course not!

Now the wife is then admonished to obey God and her husband. This is done, not by having to follow every little order given by her husband, (as a good husband would not be giving such orders to begin with), but rather by aknowledging his position in the household as the provider, and decision maker. A wife supports her husband and stands behind his decisions. In the event of his absence, she is to gaurd her chastity, and the possessions of her husband. All of this falls in the category of being obedient to her husband.

Now with regard to being obedient to God, that is when the words of controversy begin. If the husband sees that his wife is straying from the path, he is to take the following steps to correct the problem.

FIRST: the husband is to TALK to his wife, admonish her, reason with her. The first step is to try to show her where she has erred. Now remember, this is ONLY in the event of serious wrongdoing, NOT just if the husband has some small irritation.

SECOND: if step one doesn't have an effect then the husband can take the step of sleeping seperately from his wife. This is in the hopes of the wife seeing the error of her ways.

THIRD: if steps one and two don't have an effect, AND IF, AND ONLY IF, THE HUSBAND TRULY THINKS IT WILL HAVE AN EFFECT, he may then lightly beat her. Now this strike is to NEVER leave any mark or break the skin ... EVER! It is also to NEVER be on the face. This does NOT give the husband authority to pummel his wife. Even if this strike were to leave a red mark, the husband has crossed the line.

As a muslim woman married to a faithful and pious muslim man, I can assure you that the laws set out in the Quran for men and women are not signs of inequality by any stretch of the imagination. Now I certainly understand that there are many many cases of men who claim to be muslim but use the verses of the holy Quran to support their own adgenda. There are many cases of muslim women being mistreated and even abused. Please rest assured that this is not supported by true islam. The you tube video posted above is EXCELLENT and I encourage you to watch it if you have not already.

I hope this helps you in your search. If you have any other questions, please don't hesitate to ask.

peace,
MSLMGRL
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   05-30-2007, 4:06 PM
spiritandtruth is not online. Last active: 5/31/2007 3:02:45 AM spiritandtruth

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Smile [:)] Re: Need some answers
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hi there!! Sorry it has taken me a while to get back here. I was having computer problems and then I went on vacation!! Ahhhh .... sweet vacation!!

Anyway, I want to thank you both for your comments and insights. They have hepled. I have also been talking to a couple of muslims I know and asking them some questions as well. I am learning a lot that I never knew.

thank you again!!
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   05-30-2007, 7:50 PM
Guide To Salvation is not online. Last active: 1/19/2008 7:03:46 PM Guide To Salvation

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Re: Need some answers
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No Problem, Glad I could be of help. If you have any more questions, please feel free to ask any time.
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   02-16-2008, 11:44 PM
Search for truth is not online. Last active: 2/18/2008 9:20:41 AM Search for truth

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Re: Need some answers
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Dear spiritandtruth, we cannot judge a religion by its followers. The best and correct method of understanding a religion is by going through its scriptures (be it Bible, Qoran, Vedas, and so on).  This is the only way we get in touch directly with the sources.  If you wish to get an islamic view about an issue (querry), please find and read for yourself in the translation (or the meaning) of the Qoran of your language (and the authentic sayings of Muhammad (peace be upon him)). You can also communicate  with a learned person regarding the issue, but you should always aware that the absolute islamic truth is in the Qoran. 

Regards, Seek for truth


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